Ask Allie!
~ For GLBT and Questioning Teens: Answers to YOUR questions about healthy relationships ~
How can you tell if someone is Gay/Lesbian?

How can you tell if someone is Gay/Lesbian?

Before I answered this question, I wondered if others have answered it on the web. I just stuck the question into the search engine and came up with some pretty silly answers and some not so silly-rather homophobic-answers.

The truth is you cannot tell by looking at someone if they are gay/lesbian. I know, I know! You are thinking I am crazy because there are so many people out there that fit the stereotypes to a tee. And I have been known to say I can spot a person who is gay or lesbian a mile away. But the truth is there is a big difference between sexuality and community culture.

If you purport yourself to being someone who is gay or lesbian, you are saying not only are you romantically inclined to want to date someone of the same sex as you, but that you are also a part of a culture and a community.

Not everyone who is attracted to persons of the same-sex regard themselves as gay or lesbian or even bi-sexual. They may even being having same-sex sex and still not consider themselves gay or lesbian.

Also, there are allies. Allies are people who believe in supporting rights for the GLBT community. Some allies will go as far as wearing pride gear, so you can’t even tell then.

The best way to tell if someone is gay or lesbian is to actually bring it up. You can ask him/her outright (do not do this at work-it can cause problems) or you can mention the community in a conversation and see if he/she tells you he/she is gay/lesbian.

If you do determine someone is gay or lesbian, be sure to respect his/her privacy by not outing him/her to others. Coming out is very personal to every person, so it is only their story to share.

Thanks for asking!
Allie

PS. There is more information on the HATCH website about this as well!

http://www.hatchyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=70#know

Comments are closed.